Read about the Trails and Tribulations of the Computer Repair Guy who hates Windows. You'll laugh, you'll cry, because the stories are real and IT'S NOT HAPPENING TO YOU!

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I haven't mentioned

17 03 11 - 20:58

recently, have I?


That I hate windows? Perhaps I shall do so now.


A day of action to be sure. Indeed I was about 10 minutes late to my freaking 8:00 I guess because of a slight accident, after which was no traffic at all. I blame the first people past the scene. Really, if they didn't slow down, the people behind them wouldn't have had to slow down, meaning the people behind them wouldn't have slowed down, and on, and on, and on. 


He had the most popular fake anti-virus I love to combat, because it's so easy. Honestly, try harder you fake program writers. How can I been seen as a miracle worker if stuff just goes away, zip-zop? Hibby Hop? His machine is actually one of the "fastest" pentium fours made, as if their GHz rating meant anything, which it doesn't. So quite ready to be either chucked or totally reloaded at this point. He had videos of the World Series from 2002 on VHS tape. Is he ever going to watch that tape?


I then went to see the lawyer guy again, from yesterday. Apparently the wireless didn't hold, he was off again. I found the old router and hooked that back up. Piece of crap frontier equipment. If you're going to give someone a wireless router, make sure it works!


Then over to another cleanout, which wasn't a cleanout. See, this person is hard of hearing, so has parents always call me. So I never really know what's going on until I get there. He was trying, (why?) to load AOL 9.6. Uh huh. Well, it was complaining of course, and the only way I got it to load was by turning everything off and rebooting the machine. Great design there. On his laptop all his game icons didn't work. Weird, clicking on them just opened up the "saved game" folder for some bizarre reason. So I straightened that out too. 


Then to a place I discovered I knew of from ages past, full of creaking, ancient PCs, crying out to me for peace, for rest, for the glory of Silicon Heaven. Yeah, it was Win98 time boys and girls. Can you dig it? Yes I can! He's 82, and it's time to let go, my friend, and bring some new PCs into your life. You don't have the time to waste waiting for 500mhz machines from 13 years ago. His machine was booting, and then immediately going to "it is now safe to shut off your PC". Remember that pithy little jive, when PC machines were too dumb to shut themselves off? Okay, in fairness there were some Macs like that too. Well, I tried just about everything, with "everything" being a drop from a high place onto a hard surface. It would run in safe mode, but reloading windows, reloading windows into a new folder, half the RAM (twice), pulling the cards, and testing the HD all lead to the same thing. Either a hang, or "it is now safe". So of course I didn't change him, the two hours I was there would have bought a much newer used PC from craigslist, so it just didn't seem right. Oh, and his purpose for having this piece of crap 13 year old machine sucking down power and spewing heat and generally being a nuisance? To run a printer. Well, why not just plug the printer into, I don't know, the machine right NEXT TO THIS ONE???


Came back home, as I had a little time. Checked my websites, ate dinner, and went to go get my laptops back, and install some things and get some money!


Oh, and I spoke to the hotel, speaking of money, and she said she would get me the $151.20 they owed me right out. Because she wants more work done, but I want some assurance I'll be paid for the last two jobs before I start more. (Did I mention those jobs were in January?) 


The install went pretty well, blew a ton of dust out of the machine, you're welcome! Had to turn it on still open to figure out how to attach the antenna cables, but I saw how it was and that was that. Left WITH my laptops this time.


Back home, no calls today? Huh? I have one for tomorrow and three for saturday. Two already for Monday, I did get a call around 7:30, but he said tomorrow was not good. 


Oh yeah, at the Win98 place he keeps a refrigerator with drinks people come in to buy. I don't know why. Anyway, he has a whiteboard in his window with a "daily trivia question" and today's question was about rainbows. Well, a woman, possibly my age, comes in to buy an armload of drinks "I'm very thirsty" haha hehe. She comments on the rainbow question that she has no idea which color is the innermost. Really? You've never heard of ROY G BIV? What rock have you been living- oh, I suppose you're going to tell me she was a child prodigy and skipped kindergarden. Gotcha. I, perhaps wisely, did not point out this obvious deficiency in her "education" and went on cursing the windows 98 machine I was currently being tortured by, but I admit I was tempted. I should have saved, spoken up, then if it didn't go well, just reload from the save point. I always forget to do that. 



The real question is, which of us is the smarter one? Hummmmmm? The owner guy was busting out all "wavelength" of light this, and "that's why it's red at night" that, I was like, who you fooling, man? Everybody know the Good Lord made rainbows to signify his promise to never destroy the Earth again. Until that one time we like to call the "book of revelation" but whatever. Ain't no such thing as wavelength, He wanted red where it was, so that's where it was! 


But seriously, I was like, are there people who do not know these basic scientific facts? Crazy!

I want to play more Oblivion… just thought I would throw that out there.


Right! So cutting it close tomorrow is my 3:00 cleanout, then over to see Grandma, for a lovely 45 minute sit down session including whining, complaining, rambling, and looking out the window. Only one of these things will be done by me.


So I just want to personally wish all of you the absolute best weekend you can possibly imagine… in three seconds. Go ahead, take three seconds, and imagine the best possible weekend. That's what you get. Enjoy it, from me, to you.


Please, just watch out for those rainbows and their freaky "wavelength" or whatever.



P.S. You have a wavelength.